At least 3 times every week, I ask myself this question, “Would it be so bad if I killed myself?” I don’t like my life. Maybe I should just end it. (Eno, Uyo)
My dear, may I tell you that it would be catastrophic to kill yourself. Suicide is the deliberate act of killing oneself, which is what you are contemplating on doing. Suicide has never been known to solve any problem. First, you go with the guilt and pain of ending a life you never began by yourself, secondly, after your physical life ends, you sign up for everlasting pain and torture in hell and thirdly, you throw your loved ones into unwarranted pain and sorrow.
It would interest you to know that life after death is real. Permit me to say it’s more real than even the physical life. So if you think death is an escape route from pain, you’re living in deception. Just like each action has a corresponding consequence, so it applies to life after death. Everything you did while alive is played back, and the consequence is served accordingly. Hebrews 9:27 states that “it is appointed to man once to die, but after this, the judgement”. Therefore, I’ll enjoin you to discard that suicidal thought. It is not going to solve anything, not even the smallest. That thought is from the devil and the Bible says in John 10:10 “the thief cometh not, but to steal, to kill and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly”. The earlier part of the scripture quoted above shows the basic responsibility of the devil. He sows the seed of hopelessness, fear, terror, delusion, doubt and grimness in order to push people to the point of suicide. But the latter part of that scripture shows that Jesus desires that we enjoy our lives and live abundantly. He doesn’t want us to live sub-optimally; rather, He desires that we live conscious of the fact that we have all things to enjoy. This leads me to the third point.
There is nothing new under the sun. What you are currently going through is what someone else has gone through and overcome or what someone else is equally going through now or better still, it’s a light-feather issue compared to what someone, somewhere is currently going through. What is about your life that you do not like? Do you know that some people somewhere would rather trade places with you right now regardless of the mammoth size of that problem that you think is worth ending your life for? So kindly say exactly what the problem is so we can trust God to show us the way out.
On a final note, please always have at the back of your mind that you are very special to God. God loves you beyond words can ever express and that’s the truth the devil will do everything possible for you not to believe. Ecclesiastes 7:9 states that “for to him that is joined to all the living there is hope: for a living dog is better than a dead lion”. The mere fact that you’re alive means there is hope for you regardless of how dire your situation may be. You are God’s treasure, you are beautiful, you are important, you are creative, you are strong, you are inspiring, you are confident, you are a victor, you a gem because you are very precious. Don’t quit beloved daughter of God, because quitters never win and winners never quit. Regardless of how adulterated your past may be, your future remains a glorious virtue. Be courageous girl.
God loves you, so do I.