Once we break through the language barrier, and we are able to interpret the message in any conversation, communication becomes easy. Meaningful or effective communication does not just happen, you have to find time for it. The hectic lives most of us lead means that we can hardly find time except we deliberately create one out of our busy schedules. Creating time for communicating with our partners is like breathing life into the relationship each time. I am certain we are familiar with the fact that communication is a two-way thing, yet we misunderstand one another most of the time.
Relationships which are bursting with the potential to flourish die prematurely, interest and companionship never get off the ground, or worse still, wither and die because we find it so hard to discover the right way to express ourselves, so that the other person can understand us and we them. And as such, nations go to war with deadly weapons, bosses and employees work against, rather than for, each other. On a more intimate level, marriages fall apart, family relationships are strained, and friendships become soured.
Having established our present realities, we all are required to play major roles in communication if our relationships must work. It does not matter if we are not outspoken or eloquent in speech; communication is a skill that can be learned by anyone of any age, anywhere. Certainly, there are problems that will not disappear overnight, but the fact remains if your communication rate is on ground zero, whether with your marriage partner, children, relatives or friends; it can improve. Effective communication fuels every conversation, as long as we feed it with the right ingredients, it grows.
In spite of all the difficulties it leads us into; we can’t get along without it. The basics of communication is the ability to be totally honest and the willingness to commit our time to learning the art of communication. Every human being wants to be loved and understood for whom they are, these are the basic prerequisites for effective communication. In order to do this, we need time, compassion, insight and the ability to listen and express ourselves clearly. If you realize someone is easier to relate with when you show them love, then you really understand what effective communication does.
In marriage, the first thing to establish is whether you and your partner are both speaking the same language. This means there is an established decision from both sides to deepen their communication; this can only be done when there is mutual agreement. According to research, 70% of our communication is non-verbal, so whether we speak to our spouse or not, we still convey our messages one way or the other. After all, they say action speaks louder than words. We all have our own unique way of communicating; the onus is on every spouse to find the clue to that special way of communicating effectively.
Another way of stimulating communication is to convey our messages by putting them on pen and paper; a diary could be a great help here, it allows you to pour out your heart just as you want to. If you must communicate excellently, you must be an attentive listener and pay attention to details. Listening and maintaining eye contact is also another pointer in the right direction. Before you start any conversation, make it a point of duty to hear the other person’s opinion on the subject under discourse, this would avail you the required information to get the communication smoothly.
Listening is an important factor in communication; many of us need to improve in this area, if we must carry out a successful and meaningful conversation. Failure to do so may result into frustration, therefore, choose the right time and place to initiate a conversation. There is a thin line between communication and conflict, the major cause for this is misinterpretation and perhaps language barrier.