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It’s no news that one of the most misconstrued word is ‘attractiveness.’  You hear people refer to a pretty lady as being attractive. Though, we cannot say conclusively that beauty has nothing to do with attractiveness. It does, however, it’s only a fraction of attractiveness.

A friend of mine once said that, no matter how pretty a lady is, if she can’t express herself in correct grammar, he wouldn’t have anything to do with her. Also, hardly would anyone want to get close to a pretty lady or a handsome man who is extremely difficult. This is to show that attractiveness is much deeper and all encompassing than beauty.

What then is attractiveness? I define it as the ability to command people’s attention and interest to believe in what you hard displaying. Hence, if your beauty is the ONLY thing people see about you, don’t be dismayed if what people want from you is romantic relationship and sex! That’s because it’s the only thing you portray for them to see.
If beauty is only a fragment of attractiveness, what are the other fragments?

It would take a superhero to exhaust all there is about attractiveness on a single blog post. Hence, I’ll write on five major qualities that makes a person attractive.

**Good communication skill and good interpersonal relationship: No matter how good looking you are, if you don’t know how to express yourself, how to communicate your opinions to others, people might not find you attractive. Why do you think ladies love men who are outspoken?

I’m not saying you should become a chatterbox. As a super introvert who prefers to listen than to talk, I envy good communicators; because I know the importance of being one. Hence, I’m striving daily to become a better communicator. What’s the point in keeping company with someone who cannot express himself/herself?

**Knowledge makes you attractive. There’s nothing attractive in ignorance. Being knowledgeable in your field and other relevant life affairs makes you attractive because people will always love to learn from you. They know you’ll surely have something to contribute.

Read books to broaden your horizon. Be a combination of beauty and brains. Of what use is a lovely hairstyle on an empty head?

*Being positive makes you attractive: No one loves to hang out with negative people because they always see adversity in every opportunity. They are always grumbling and complaining.

Being positive draws people to you because they feel inspired staying near you. You make them see hope in seemingly hopeless situations. They are motivated to pursue their desires and not to give up. I’m sure you prefer staying around a person who inspires you than one who depresses you.

**Meeting a need makes you attractive: The world only needs people who are meeting needs. What need are you meeting? If your beauty is the only thing you’re proud of, kindly ask yourself how you have been meeting people’s needs with it.

People who are meeting needs are the most sought after because they have what people need. Jesus was always surrounded by crowd anytime He was out. Why? Because they knew he would offer them healings, food, miracles, and knowledge.

What do you have to offer? I have purposed to offer knowledge (that’s why you’re reading this) and good listening ears to people. I can’t but be attractive. Don’t beef me. Hehehe

**Competence makes you attractive: The goodnews says, “Have you seen a man who is diligent in his business? He shall work before kings, he shall not work before mean men.”

What have you discovered that you can do? How are you doing it? The world doesn’t seek amateurs but competent people who are extremely good at what they do. Why do you think the likes of Ben Carson, Chimamanda Adichie, Tyler Perry, Funke Akindele, Genevieve Nnaji, Fela Durotoye, and a host of others are celebrated?

It’s not because they are more beautiful than others; but because they are extremely competent at what they do. Don’t be a mediocre! Strive for excellence in your venture. It takes diligence to be attractive. Lazy people can never be attractive. Attractiveness requires hard work! On yourself!

I don’t just wanna be a writer! I want to be an attractive writer! Hence, I must write well. What about you?

Olu Mabel

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